Call to Nature

Keep close to nature’s heart . . . and break clear away once in a while, and climb a mountain or spend a week in the woods. Wash your spirit clean.”  — John Muir

I was going through my Bloglovin’ Feed, and this was a quote that was posted on one of my favorite quilt blogs.  It really resonated with me, and I found myself wanting to experience some nature.

In the past few weeks, I have spent a lot of my time dreaming of moving.  Move to another house.  In the city?  In the country?  In another state?  All these options actually came into my mind.  And at one point, I actually thought about moving in with my mother.  Each time, I would come back to the fact that I love my Quilt/Sewing Studio, and I don’t know where I would go that I would have the extra space to set up my studio and just leave it set up. It is such a luxury, and I waited a long time for it.  So I always decide to just stay put.

I started to ponder what it really means – to want to move to another house or another place.  And I think that I really just want to change the space that I am living in.  I think we all choose the space we live in, but we just aren’t conscious of it.  We go through the same routines (and behind those routines), the same thoughts and moods and perceptions and attitudes.  So I have come to the realization that I need to change those thoughts, moods, perceptions and attitudes.  That will change the “house” where I live.

Old habits die hard, though, and as much as I desire to change, the same triggers keep me “hanging ’round.”

Today, when I saw that quote from John Muir, I realized I am feeling a little bit of a nature deficit.  I have the urge to sit by water and even more so, I want to sit on rocks, away from people, and just be with the elements.

When I was a little girl, there were some large rocks sitting beside a big tree in the middle of the field.  One was flat on top, and I used to go out there and lie on my back and connect with the earth, the sky and all of nature.  I didn’t know that was what I was doing at the time.  I thought I was just getting away from my siblings.

Writing that, I realize that maybe what I am feeling is that urge to “get away” from my siblings.  Ha!  We have had a lot of family togetherness lately.  My brother and his husband have been visiting from California, so we all try to connect as much as possible while he is home.  I’m thinking maybe this is a trigger from childhood.  I connect rocks with time to get away from eight siblings and their opinions and judgments.  Time to reconnect with myself and my soul.

It has been rather tropical here in the Midwest lately.  I’m not one for trekking about in sultry weather.  Humidity is a beast that turns me into a beast.  To quote my mother, “Breathing outside right now is like breathing in a glass of warm water.”  Not too pleasant.  And they have now found West Nile virus in a mosquito in our county.  With the record rainfall, the mosquitoes are out in droves!  These factors make walks to the woods into an unpleasant experience instead of the cleansing that those walks usually provide.

So I am going to try to find solace, peace and healing by looking at pictures of nature on the internet.  Here’s a blog I found that you might enjoy, as well.

This guy has some awesome photographs that can really take you there.  I just need to push the longing aside and let my imagination and memory of felt sense take me there.   “Breaking clear away….” may not happen, but I hope I can “wash my spirit clean.”


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